The Long Road to Recovery…

Well, after the first day of surgery, I felt great for a couple of days!  I didn't move much, but I was able to take care of myself and even put a simple meal on the table.  My husband took the girls to a horse show the day after surgery, and thankfully a friend came to take my son for a couple of hours.  I thought I could take care of him, but that was a little tougher than I'd expected.

Six days post-op I went for my follow-up and was still feeling pretty okay, other than some cramping.  I told the doctor that I just wanted to sleep a lot, and she said that was normal.  She also reiterated that we can only hope that removing the gallbladder will resolve all the issues that I had been having… only time will tell. 

The next day, though, was a tough one.  That night I had what felt and seemed like another one of my attacks.  I was shaky, vomiting, had chills, and was sweaty/clammy.  I just did not feel right at all.  I asked my husband to take me to the hospital, but he didn't feel that was necessary.  It took a long time to fall asleep because of how bad I felt, but sleep finally came around 3:30.  That is not a night I want to repeat, but at least I finally went to the bathroom and got everything out.

Looking back, I don't know if that was another attack or my body responding to something I ate, or just my body responding to no more pain meds and the aftereffects of surgery.  I wonder about the anesthesia that was used this time; it does seem a lot harder to stay awake.  Now when I eat certain foods, my stomachs starts to hurt, and I go lie down, afraid of getting sick.  I guess it will take time to learn what I can and cannot eat… and I've heard sometimes you can't eat things right after gall bladder surgery that in a few months don't bother you.  I sure hope in a few months I can eat whatever I want.  I don't really like this game of not knowing what will make me feel sick… it kind of makes me afraid to eat!  Anyway, the good news is that I am still unable to eat as much as I did before surgery.  I just don't have the same appetite I used to have.  I pray that once I fully recover from the surgery that I will feel better than my old self, be able to eat anything, and never had another attack like I had been having.

It is a long road to recovery… but isn't that the way it often is?  No matter what we get ourselves into, the getting into something is easy, but the getting out of - or the recovery - is a long road.  It is a road we cannot take alone.  And as scary as it may be at times, we cannot allow fear to have a place in our lives.  Jesus tells not to fear, because we are of more value to our Father than the sparrows He cares for.

 "Are not two sparrows sold for a cent?

And yet not one of them will fall to the ground apart from your Father. 

But the very hairs of your head are all numbered.

So do not fear; you are more valuable than many sparrows." 

-Matthew 10:29-31

Taken in context, Jesus was referring to not fearing those who can kill the body, but not the soul (verse 28), however, if He knows us inside and out, and cares for us more than the birds of the sky, I believe He cares about every detail of our lives and wants us to live completely without fear.  God truly does care about every detail of our lives.  He created us… He knows us… He loves us…

When I am afraid,

I will put my trust in You.

In God, whose word I praise,

In God I have put my trust;

I shall not be afraid.

-Psalm 5:3-4

Whatever has happened in your life, you, too, may be on a long road to recovery.  You do not have to be afraid of anything of this world, of any illness, of any enemy.  You do not have to walk this road alone.

If we have put our trust in the Lord, we have nothing to fear, and we will not walk this path alone.  God is with us. Always.

"Never will I leave you; never will I forsake you." -Hebrews 13:5