Confessions of a Homeschool Mom

Yes, I homeschool my children.  No, I do not think that makes me better than anyone else.  Actually, I know that I am nowhere near the perfect mom.  I will be the first to tell you that homeschooling is hard, and it is not for everyone.  I fought against the decision to homeschool.  But God showed me that this was the plan He has for us, and now I am glad I took the path less travelled.

A lot of people have misconceptions about homeschooling.  People who do not homeschool sometimes think we either slack off and our children are missing out or they think we are more capable parents and our children excel.  People who do homeschool sometimes fall into the trap of comparing themselves to other homeschooling parents, thinking they need to be perfect, or think they don't have what it takes.  We all struggle no matter what path we take.

I am going to expel some of those myths about the schooling that happens in my home.  

We do occasionally slack off, but we make up for it later.  If it is a particular nice day, I let the children enjoy nature.  I have a chronic illness, so when I don't feel well we either skip that day and make it up on Saturday or at the end of the year, or we start school in the afternoon when I have more energy.  Sometimes we even do school in the evening!  

While we may have days that we slack off, we school year round - without long breaks.  During the summer we cover two subjects a day.  We don't take all the traditional holidays: on Martin Luther King, Jr. Day we study the Civil Rights Movement, on the Fourth of July we study America's path to independence, on President's day - you get the idea.  This means we actually get more school days in than we are required or than children in a classroom setting. 

We don't 'do' school.  We have school.  School at home is still school, and it is still a vital part of our children's lives.  I believe that every moment is an opportunity to learn, so we take our education with us throughout the day, every day.  It is not uncommon for me my children what type of speech the nurse used or what type of sentence the doctor used.  If we see an animal or plant I will ask them to what kingdom it belongs and we will review the classifications of living things.  They do math in the grocery store.  We compare current events to history.  Education is very important to my husband and me, and we do expect our children to obtain college degrees. 

I make mistakes!  Sometimes my children point out a math problem I worked incorrectly or a date I got wrong in history.  That's okay - public school teachers sometimes make mistakes, too.  No teacher is perfect.  We correct our mistakes and learn from them.

I am not super mom.  I do not always make the best parenting choices.  Sometimes I yell.  Sometimes I am too tired or frustrated to correct my children.  Sometimes my children embarrass me in public.  However, many times my children make me proud to be their mother.  My children love me and tell me so, and they forgive me when I mess up.

I do not have it all together!  While I try to plan out our year in advance, that does not always come to fruition.  Sometimes I am finalizing lesson plans during breakfast or while my children are doing independent work.  Sometimes I don't grade papers for a week or longer.  Sometimes I forget whether I am coming or going.  Every once in a while I forget to cook dinner or I put my purse in the freezer.

My children do excel in some subjects, but they are each average students in other subjects.  Everyone has their own weaknesses and strengths.  Of course I think they are highly intelligent, but I should think that - they are my children.  But I also recognize where they need more work, where they struggle.  My children do not make straight A's because I give them the grades they deserve.  When my children do make a low score, I go back and reteach them the material because it is important for them to understand what they are being taught - otherwise, what would be the purpose of educating our children?  My children are given deadlines and are expected to meet them.  Most of the time when they don't meet a deadline or get a subject completed it is my fault rather than theirs because I have forgotten about the subject (they are still all 10 and under and need my involvement) or I have misplaced something they need to complete their work.

My children are socialized.  They go to church activities, to Classical Conversations, on field trips, and on play dates.  They have no problems playing with the other children in the neighborhood.  But I do not consider them 'normal' children.  They are children of the King who are loved unconditionally and who have a light shining in them.  They are extremely loved by parents who care about every aspect of their lives and who want to enjoy every minute with them until they leave home as young adults.  They know they can talk with us about anything.  They are also learning to be polite, to hold doors open for others, to pray before meals, to pray for the needs of others, to share, and to be compassionate.  They do not watch a lot of television - I turn the television on once or twice a week.  They do have some video games and a Wii, but they are limited in the amount of time on those, as well.  They know how to use their imaginations and how to play outside with nothing except what nature provides.  They enjoy spending time with their parents.

I sometimes think I don't have what it takes to homeschool.  I sometimes compare myself to other homeschoolers.  But then I get a good dose of reality and realize the other homeschoolers do not have it all together, either.  I realize that I, as most homeschoolers, do not have what it takes - it is only through the grace of God that we homeschool as He equips us to do what He has called us to do.

Some days I am envious of those who send their children to pubic or private school.  I crave time alone.  I want to go out to lunch with my friends or go shopping alone.  I want to snuggle up with a good cup of coffee and a book - just me, my blanket, and my couch.  Then God will remind me through a good friend or through His Word that He has entrusted these precious children to me for only a short time.  In five or six years I will be able to leave the house for an hour or two with the children doing their independent studies.  And I know those five or six years will go by all too quickly.   In a few years after that I will have an empty house and I can do the things I see other moms doing every day.  For now my job is to train, teach, love, and enjoy my children.

We are not all called to educate our children in the same manner.   Don't compare yourself to others.  Don't judge others based on where God has you.  And whatever path we are called to today may turn or fork tomorrow.  I do not know if we will always homeschool, but I know that God will always prepare us and show us the way.  Whatever path God has you on today, embrace it.  Be joyful and follow His leadings. 

If you fully obey the LORD your God and carefully follow all his commands I give you today, the LORD your God will set you high above all the nations on earth.  All these blessings will come on you and accompany you if you obey the LORD your God… Deuteronomy 28:1-2